OK, I lied

I haven't lost 7 pounds. Who the hell loses 7 pounds in 4 days unless you're Michelle Martinez and eat only straw? Not I, friends.

I have, however, lost 1.5 pounds.

I'm not impressed. I fluctuate between 153.5 and 155 constantly. I've even dipped to 152 and that was a wonderful six hours, I can tell you that.

But when I dip under 150? That will be huge.

When I got married, I was 108 pounds. Oh yes, SSS once had her thin days. Granted, they didn't last long. By the time I moved to Austin in 1999, I was 120 -- a very respectable number indeed!

By 2000, I had gotten up to 138. I remember the moment I stepped on the scale and saw those numbers very very well. Turns out I was pregnant.

Since then... well. You know.

So. I'm on vacation for two weeks. That's what happens when you don't use your vacation days until the end of time. This week, though, I'm focusing on staying under 1500 calories a day.

Watching the Nutty Professor, however, is not helping. Drop the tub of cookie dough, Eddie Murphy! Drop it now!!